Saturday, 8 September 2018

26-YEAR-OLD PREGNANT WOMAN BRUTALLY MURDERED BY SUGAR-DADDY...

Sharon Otieno’s body was found dumped in the bushes on the side of the road, covered in stab wounds, a day after she went missing. The 26-year-old was seven months pregnant, and investigatorssaid she was attacked so viciously that even her unborn child had been stabbed. Her murder, and the circumstances around it, have shocked Kenya, and continue to dominate conversations on Twitter.

But the investigation into her death been accompanied by a debate about “sugar daddy” or “sponsor” culture, which is when a wealthy person (usually a man) pays someone (usually a woman) large sums of money and finances their lifestyle — everything from university tuition to an apartment — in exchange for sex or companionship. These consensual transactions are not new to Kenya or anywhere else in the world, but have recently gained a massive platform with the help of social media, where women publicize the lavish lifestyles they lead.

Many women view these sorts of relationships strictly as a means of earning money to pay for school fees or to support their families. It is the alleged relationship Otieno was believed to have had with Gov. Okoth Obado, who oversees Migori County in southwestern Kenya, that is the reason why, despite the horrific nature of her death, some people are still suggesting she was at least partly to blame.

Obado’s office did not respond to a BuzzFeed News request for comment, but his spokesperson, Nicholas Anyuor, told media in Kenya the governor would not get involved in the case, “which is under police investigation, because he has not been implicated in it.”

Otieno, 26, was a second-year student at Rongo University, located in western Kenya, studying medical records and information. If Otieno and Obado were in a relationship, it remains unclear when it started, or what, exactly, it entailed, but her mother, Melinda Auma, has said her daughter told her Obado was the father of her unborn child.

“I remember that in the early stages of her pregnancy, I asked her to tell us who was responsible for it and she told me it was Gov. Obado,” Auma told the Daily Nation, a Kenyan newspaper. “At one time she even said he had promised to buy her a house and take care of her pregnancy and, later, the baby.”

But as Otieno’s due date drew near, she began to worry that Obado would not follow through on his promise to take care of the baby, so she reportedly decided to expose their relationship through the press,according to Daily Nation journalist Barrack Oduor. He said he had arranged to meet with Otieno to discuss the matter for a potential story, so he contacted the governor’s office for comment.

Oduor said he was told that Obado’s assistant, Michael Oyamo, would meet both him and Otieno on Monday, Sept. 3, to clarify the situation.

According to reports, the assistant led Otieno and Oduor out of the hotel where they’d all agreed to meet, and into a car, so that, according to the assistant, they could talk at a different location. Oduor later said that at one point, the driver pulled over and all at once, the assistant got out of the car as two men entered it, sandwiching him and Otieno together in the backseat.

Oduor said that when he tried to ask why Oyamo had gotten out of the car, the two men in the backseat demanded that he and Otieno hand over their phones and belongings.

Oduor said they had been driving for about 40 miles when Otieno started to cry. According to Oduor, an altercation ensued between him, Otieno, and the two other men in the backseat, with one man trying to hold Otieno down and the other attempting to strangle Oduor. But Oduor managed to fend off the attack and jumped out of the moving car. He said he made his way to a nearby police station and recorded a statement, alerting the public that Otieno was missing.

Police found her body dumped in a pile of bushes in the small town of Oyugis in Homa Bay County late Tuesday night, igniting a string of hashtags like #JusticeForSharon and#ArrestOkothObado. Rongo University students demonstrated for Otieno’s killers to be jailed Tuesday afternoon, and two lawmakers from the county issued a joint statement calling on investigators to work quickly to solve the crime.

“This should be the true test of DCI [Directorate of Criminal Investigations]. Whether it's a governor or an MP involved, nobody should be spared,” said Gladys Wanga, the women’s representative of Homa Bay County.

Opposition leader and former prime minister Raila Odinga later told a news conference, “We want to condemn this act of thuggery in the strongest way possible. And we hope that the perpetrators of this heinous crime are going to be brought to book in a speedy way.” The government has said the murder will be “expeditiously investigated.”

BuzzFeed News has reached out to Homa Bay investigations director Daniel Wachira for an update on the case. Obado’s assistant was arrested on Tuesday and he is currently undergoing questioning. On Friday the government pathologist said Otieno had been stabbed eight times, in her neck, back, and abdomen. Police said there was evidence to suggest she'd been sexually assaulted prior to her murder.

Even in the wake of Otieno’s tragic death, some Kenyans have seized the opportunity to shame her, and other women, who engage in sugar daddy or sponsor relationships, going so far as to suggest that they deserve whatever happens to them as a result.

Even Wanga, one of the lawmakers advocating for Otieno’s killers to be swiftly brought to justice, told young women to accept their “humble backgrounds” and steer clear of sponsors.

But other Kenyan women told BuzzFeed News that these comments not only miss the point, but trivialize Otieno’s death.

Valentine Njoroge, who writes about feminism and sex, told BuzzFeed News that criticizing Otieno for the type of relationship she may have had with the governor was short-sighted.

“To say that she shouldn’t have had an affair with him, or to point to the man like he’s the victim, is just really fucking lazy,” she said, adding that women with sugar daddies are rarely given a chance to speak up for themselves.

“The truth is, for a lot of women in these relationships, it’s not about their pleasure,” she said. “The guy calls the shots in the bedroom, and there’s no talk about condoms or HIV testing. Why wouldn’t he [Gov. Obado] wear a condom if he didn’t want her to get pregnant?”

Njoroge also said that people are asking the wrong questions when it comes to women who have been victimized as a result of their partnerships with older men.

“We have to ask ourselves why is it that more and more men seek out these relationships,” she said. “It’s one thing to point fingers at the young girls. They’re looking for money. But what is the male looking for that makes this kind of relationship attractive? Obado has probably been having sex for longer than Sharon was alive. What made her so attractive to him?”

Felista Wangari, a Kenyan journalist, told BuzzFeed News that the focus on Otieno and Obado’s alleged relationship draws attention away from the actual crime.

“In Kenya, we like to blame the woman, and we absolve the man from any responsiblity,” she said. “We say he was a helpless man who the young girl preyed upon, who stole him from his wife and caused heartbreak to the family.

As if the man has no mind of his own, dragged into the relationship at gunpoint. If he says, ‘I want that girl,’ it could be life-threatening if she says no.”

Given the prevalence of intimate partner homicides all over the world — at least half of the women murdered in 2012 were killed by their sexual partners, according to aUN study — Njoroge said it’s baffling that Obado has not been arrested yet.

Otieno is not the first woman who has had an encounter with a politician or wealthy Kenyan man and wound up dead.

On June 17, 2011, a young woman named Mercy Keino went to a party that was also attended by former Kiambu County governor William Kabogo. According to reports, Kabogo slapped Keino at the party, and she ran away. The next day, Keino, 25, was found dead, having been run over by a car. Kabogo was charged with murder, but was cleared of the charge in 2016.

And a week before Kenya’s elections last August, Carol Ngumbu, 21, was found in a car, having been strangled to death along with electoral commissioner Chris Msando, causing rumors of a romantic relationship to swirl. Her case, like Msando’s, is still open.

Wangari noted that the deaths of these young women who’ve been connected to politicians haven’t stopped the relationships from happening, which makes complaining about them useless.

“They’re not protecting anyone by claiming to say these are the consequences of dating an older, powerful man,” she said.

“And if you sanction murder for such a flimsy reason, then at the end of the day, we will all be in danger.”

CARDI B AND NICKI MINAJ GETS INTO HUGE FIGHT AT A NEW YORK FASHION PARTY CAUGHT ON VIDEO...

Cardi B was escorted out of a New York fashion party Friday night after allegedly trying to attack fellow rapper Nicki Minaj.

Photos from the incident showed her with a swollen bump on her forehead as she was taken outside, an injury purportedly caused by Minaj's security detail who intervened.

Video footage on social media showed Cardi B being held back as she was escorted out of Harper’s Bazaar "Icons" party.

In an Instagram post that didn't name Minaj at 12:14 a.m., Cardi B wrote that she has “let a lot of shit slide!”

“I let you sneak diss me, I let you lie on me, I let you attempt to stop my bags, fuck up the way I eat! You’ve threaten other artists in the industry, told them if they work with me you’ll stop fuckin with them!!"

She added: "I addressed you once in person, I addressed you a second time in person, and every time you copped the plea!"

A witness who declined to be named because they were not authorized to speak publicly told the Associated Press that Minaj was talking to someone when Cardi B tried to attack her, but security guards intervened.

As Cardi B was escorted out of the venue, a welt on her forehead was clearly visible.

Cardi B and Minaj have been two of the more prolific rap artists in the past year, apparently sparking a rivalry. Cardi B, who also noted criticism of her mothering skills in her Instagram post, recently had her first child with rapper Offset.

Outlets, including TMZ, reportedthat Cardi B allegedly threw one of her high-heeled shoes at Minaj during the altercation.

After news of the incident broke, Late Night Twitter was obviously here for it.

Minaj has yet to address the alleged altercation but has been updating her Instagram page with a selfie video of herself and photos.

WOMAN DEVELOPS BLACK HAIRY TONGUE AFTER TAKING ANTIBIOTICS...

A 55-year-old woman who was originally admitted to the hospital after her legs were crushed in a car accident. When she developed a wound infection, she was given antibiotics — but after one week, something strange started to happen. In addition to feeling nauseous and having a bad taste in her mouth, the woman noticed her tongue had turned black.

The team caring for the woman called Dr. Yasir Hamad, a doctor at the hospital and assistant professor at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis, Missouri. Hamad, who coauthored the case study, had read about the condition before but hadn’t seen it in real life. “When I went and saw her, it was a classic, textbook case of black hairy tongue,” he told BuzzFeed News.

Yes, black hairy tongue, or lingua villosa nigra, as it’s also known medically, is a real thing. Before you panic and repeatedly check your tongue in the mirror, know that it’s harmless and reversible. But why does it happen and how is it cured? We spoke to Dr. Hamad — and looked at countless images of discolored tongues — to find out.

First, your tongue isn’t actually growing coarse black hairs (cue: sigh of relief). What happens is that the papillae — tiny cylindrical structures on the tongue’s surface — elongate, so that food particles and bacteria get stuck, which produces a stain, Hamad explained.

When people have this condition, the tongue usually looks yellowish or brownish — most cases are not as dramatic or intensely black as this one, Hamad said. Either way, it’s still benign. “It doesn’t look great, but it doesn’t cause harm.”

Black hairy tongue is a side effect of certain medications, but it can also be caused by smoking, poor oral hygiene, poor diet, chemotherapy, and some medical conditions.

In this woman’s case, it was a side effect of minocycline, which is a tetracycline-class antibiotic that is sometimes used to treat acne. The drug is relatively well tolerated but can also have serious side effects if taken for long periods of time. “It can cause discoloration of the eyes, and we don’t give it to kids because it can permanently stain the teeth,” said Hamad.

The treatment for black hairy tongue typically includes removing the medication or agent causing it and practicing good oral hygiene. Hamad and his team took the patient off minocycline, and within four weeks, her tongue looked normal.

So if you do notice your tongue turning brown or black, don’t panic, but do go to a doctor or dentist to get it checked out.

Monday, 3 September 2018

WOMAN CANCELS DREAM WEDDING AFTER DISCOVERING FIANCÉ WATCHES PORN...

A woman has revealed she cancelled her dream wedding just a week before the big day - after discovering her fiancé watched porn. Claire Dalton's ex kept the habit secret from her throughout their four-year friendship and relationship and she was so shocked she called off the marriage - despite having spent six months planning it.

The 21-year-old is very religious and said she has been dreaming of a relationship which was "true and pure" and "governed by God's law" since she was young girl, in a blog post written for Love What Matters. She thought she'd found that with her unnamed fiancé, who she split from a year ago, but now believes it was "all a lie from the beginning".

Just a week before the wedding American Claire, who's a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons), and her fiancé were running errands for their big day - and she checked his phone to see if a shop was still open. But when she saw his search bar, she realised he had "been searching for pornography possibly just hours ago", and immediately "felt sick to (her) stomach".

At first, her husband-to-be lied and said his brother had borrowed his phone, before later admitting: "It's me... I have a problem."

She added: "At first, I thought it was some sick joke.  It never occurred to me that pornography addiction would ever leak into my life or affect me in such a deep and excruciating way."

After hearing him admit the truth, Claire decided to call off the wedding - and had to call every one of her 300 guests to break the news. But she said it wasn't so much the porn which was the problem, but the fact that he'd lied about it for years.

Claire said: "Someone I loved and cared for deeply had been expertly lying to me for the entire length of our relationship, and possibly longer, since we had been friends for so long.

"All at once, I was with a stranger instead of the person I thought I knew so well. In an instant I could never trust those lying eyes ever again.

"All I ever wanted in a relationship was honesty, and it quickly occurred to me the only honesty I’d known at that point was fake."